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Last week I got to watch a couple who is truly in love. It was beautiful. Despite their differences, they’ve overcome everything to end up together. That is what I’m looking for. Someone I can look at and know they love me as much as I love them, no exceptions.
I have a tendency, as all females do, to look towards the future after a good series of dates, day dream about the what ifs. My level of hope rises, and the slightest perceived set back is upsetting. I wish I didn’t react like that. I wish I knew how to react. I normally have no problem making the first move, but when I’m really starting to like someone I second guess everything I say and do.
For instance, due to life circumstances I finally met someone a year or more after first introductions. It went very well, until yesterday, when the conversation grew short and eventually stopped. I’ve heard nothing today. This is where the second guessing comes in. Did I make him mad because I spent yesterday doing things I needed to do? Or am I just overreacting? If it’s the first, he can kiss my ass. If it’s the second do I wait for a message from him? Or do I send something. As much as I want the interaction I think I need to wait and see if he contacts me.
I hate this part. I wish I could just tell him how I feel and be done with it. Can it work like that?

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