, ,

I hate when I get like this, when depression rears it’s ugly head. My mood is perpetually pissed off, and there’s nothing good going on. I focus on all the negatives, and no positives break through the shell. I’m never really sure when it will hit, nor how long it will last. What I do know is I hate it. I don’t take medication and won’t, because it does nothing but muddle my mind. My mind is my strongest asset, I don’t need it to not function. I think it usually starts with something small, and my subconscious blows it out of proportion.
I’m hoping something will happen this week to knock out this funk. Or that I can at least channel it into something constructive or creative. Here’s to hoping anyway.
P.S. Update on guy I’m “waiting” on to call….he posted a status update to Facebook but my friend request still sits unanswered. This might give me a push to get out of this funk, because anger and frustration are easier to redirect than depression is. I don’t have the patience for things like this. Not to say I won’t talk to him if he ever calls, but it definitely colors my response.